A picture of the President of Corked Bats Incorporated has surfaced, and you wouldn’t believe what Sammy looks like. Maybe it’s on homage to the late, great Michael Jackson. Maybe the former heavy hitter is tired of being chased around by the dogs from the Mitchell Report. I really didn’t think that Sammy could make a better face than the “uhhhh” face he made when his corked bat exploded during a game from 2003. But look at that picture…that face is waaaay more entertaining.
Even Sammy’s wife, who’s pictured with him, has a bewildered look on her face. The white pigment of his skin, allegedly, is due to a skin cleansing process that Sammy is looking to try and be more beautiful. Well it worked, if you consider the messed up way Michael Jackson “bleached” his skin attractive in any way. Sosa’s people are trying to defend the accusations, but it’s not like Sammy’s public appearance is based on truth.
Besides the awkward hilarity of the corked bat incident in 2003, Sosa’s name surfaced on a list of 103 players that reportedly used performance enhancing drugs. The list also named David Ortiz, Manny Ramirez and Sosa’s former slugger brother, Mark McGwire. To say that this latest white out is another blemish on his already ugly record is the least we can say.
Sosa claims he will be waiting for his phone to ring some time during 2013 when he becomes eligible for the Hall of Fame. Despite a 1998 National League MVP, seven All-Star selections and a 2000 Home Run Derby victory, Sosa’s recent claim that he’s worthy of the hall of fame was met by feverish hellfire by baseball fans. After all, he’s cheated and lied throughout his end 18-year career. It’s not like the entire Hall of Shame in Cooperstown isn’t already bristling with scandalous cheaters, so Sammy would fit right in. And not just because he’s now a white boy.