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NFL Power Rankings Week 15
by Tim Furious
1. Indianapolis Colts (13-0, 9-4 ATS)
Thirteen wins this season. Twenty-two in a row. The only number that matters at this point is “44”, the exact edition of the Super Bowl in February. The best thing that could happen to them this season is going undefeated and winning the title, which is exactly what the archrival Patriots failed to do. Left on the schedule are Jacksonville, New York Jets and Buffalo. Any of those teams would consider this season a success if they derailed the Colts’ perfect season.
Next Game: Indianapolis vs. Jacksonville
2. New Orleans Saints (13-0, 8-5 ATS)
If you think that Saints games are “exciting” and not “terribly and disparagingly worrisome” then you’re drinking the swamp water from the bayou.
Next Game: Dallas vs. New Orleans (-7)
3. Minnesota Vikings (11-2 SU, 8-4-1 ATS)
If Brett Favre is sputtering, they have Adrian Peterson. If Percy Harvin is missing, Sidney Rice will step in. No E.J. Henderson? Welcome back, Antoine Winfield. Depth and tenacity are the mark of a champion in this era of the NFL…and the Vikings have both in spades.
Next Game: Minnesota (-7) vs. Carolina
4. San Diego Chargers (10-3 SU, 7-6 ATS)
Who cares if Philip Rivers is “Mr. December”? Undefeated in December doesn’t mean anything if you’re 3-3 SU in January. The bye week in the playoffs would be a very good thing for the Chargers.
Next Game: Cincinnati vs. San Diego (-6.5)
5. Green Bay Packers (9-4 SU, 8-4-1 ATS)
Ryan Grant’s 137-yards effectively put him on the map as a backfield beast in 2009. The timing couldn’t be better. The Packers won’t catch the Vikings, but they’re making me eat my words as an 8-8 SU team with no closing power. The Packers and Chargers are peaking across the nines at exactly the right time.
Next Game: Green Bay vs. Pittsburgh (-1.5)
6. Philadelphia Eagles (9-4 SU, 8-5 ATS)
Well I guess none of us will get to find out if McNabb knew that there could be a three-way tie in a division. The Eagles now have a bare grasp on the NFC East lead, and Andy Reid is pulling all sorts of tricks out of the bag with Michael Vick. Obviously the phrases “Andy Reid”, “Michael Vick” and “tricks out of the bag” just has disaster written all over it, but hey, I’m not going to rain on the Eagles’ parade. I’ll save that if and when they serve as cannon fodder in the NFC Championship game again.
Next Game: San Francisco vs. Philadelphia
7. New England Patriots (8-5 SU, 6-7 ATS)
New England’s final three games are against Buffalo, Jacksonville and Houston. For a team that’s in supposed disarray, 11-5 SU wouldn’t be so freaking terrible.
Next Game: New England (-7) vs. Buffalo
8. Cincinnati Bengals (9-4 SU, 6-7 ATS)
I’ll start caring about the Bengals when they start caring about scoring touchdowns. For a team as talented and experienced as the Bengals, they play like a bunch of cowards.
Next Game: Cincinnati vs. San Diego (-6.5)
9. Miami Dolphins (7-6 SU/ATS)
No receiving corps? Camarillo had 110-yards in Week 14, and Bess had 117 last week. Don’t you dare doubt Chad Henne. He might be the best thing to come out of Michigan since Tom Brady.
Next Game: Miami vs. Tennessee
10. Arizona Cardinals (8-5 SU/ATS)
The Cardinals lose their games by an average of 11.2 points. With momentum, they’re as dangerous as any contender in the NFC. Without it, they’re almost as bad as Tampa Bay.
Next Game: Arizona vs. Detroit
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11. Denver Broncos (8-5 SU/ATS)
B-Marsh can celebrate his personal achievement all he wants. At least Terrell Owens’ twenty-catches brought him a victory in the playoffs. This record was just another footnote in the hallmark season of the Colts.
Next Game: Oakland vs. Denver (-11.5)
12. Tennessee Titans (6-7 SU/ATS)
This has been a year of second chances for the Titans, and if Kerry Collins can somehow keep the ball rolling like he did against St. Louis, then the Titans will get a second-chance in the playoffs to right the wrongs of last season when they entered the post season as the best team in the league.
Next Game: Miami vs. Tennessee
13. Baltimore Ravens (7-6 SU/ATS)
Weirdest trend in all of the NFL: the Ravens haven’t beat a team that’s had momentum all season. Go back and look at their schedule and they’ve never managed to beat a single team that’s had any good fortune. Good thing they close the season against Chicago, Pittsburgh and Oakland, I suppose.
Next Game: Chicago vs. Baltimore (-10)
14. Dallas Cowboys (8-5 SU, 6-7 ATS)
It’s not often that I ever agree with an owner criticizing his team publicly, but when Jerry Jones said that Marion Barber should serve as a closer and not a starter, he’s probably right.
Next Game: Dallas vs. New Orleans (-7)
15. Houston Fire Gary Kubiak” talk died in a damn hurry!
Next Game: Houston vs. St. Louis
16. New York Jets (7-6 SU/ATS)
I really wish I could’ve seen the grin on Kellen Clemens’ face in the locker room after steering the Jets to a victory. It’d be the perfect example of the “I told ya so” face.
Next Game: Atlanta vs. NYJ
17. New York Giants (7-6 SU, 5-7-1 ATS)
The Giants are in a very familiar spot, where they’re counting on Tony Romo screwing things up late in the season, and Andy Reid forgetting how to coach in the fourth quarter. It’s a long shot for the Giants at this point, but those are two very possible points of optimism for the Giants’ betting faithful.
Next Game: NYG vs. Washington
18. San Francisco 49ers (6-7 SU, 8-3-2 ATS)
When the Niners’ defense is generating turnovers, they do it in droves, just like they did against Arizona on Monday Night Football. This defense absolutely loves playing in prime time, where they’ve piled up 12 turnovers in two games against Chicago and Arizona.
Next Game: San Francisco vs. Philadelphia
19. Pittsburgh Steelers (6-7 SU, 4-9 ATS)
I think we misunderstood Mike Tomlin when he said he was going to “unleash hell”. He meant he was going to do that on Steeler Nation.
Next Game: Green Bay vs. Pittsburgh (-1.5)
20. Jacksonville Jaguars (7-6 SU, 5-8 ATS)
David Garrard hasn’t posted back-to-back games where he threw multiple touchdowns in two years. One touchdown would’ve Texans (6-7 SU, 5-8 ATS) Man, that “been nice against Miami though. Tebow, anyone?
Next Game: Indianapolis vs. Jacksonville
21. Washington Redskins (4-9 SU, 6-6-1 ATS)
The sad fact about the NFC East is that no team in the division is actually playing better than the Washington Redskins in every phase of the game. And they’re doing this without Clinton Portis.
Next Game: NYG vs. Washington
22. Chicago Bears (5-8 SU, 4-8ATS)
Matt Forte’s last name means “strength” when translated from French to English. Maybe he should change his name to “Faible”, which is the French words for “weak”.
Next Game: Chicago vs. Baltimore (-10)
23. Seattle Seahawks (5-8 SU/ATS)
More bad news in Seattle: Matt Hasselbeck can’t stay healthy and Seneca Wallace is worth about 30 cents on the dollar.
Next Game: Tampa Bay vs. Seattle (-7)
24. Buffalo Bills (5-8 SU, 7-6 ATS)
Classiest move of the week came from one of the league’s biggest troublemakers. Terrell Owens immediately used his Twitter account to congratulate Brandon Marshall on breaking his record.
Next Game: New England (-7) vs. Buffalo
25. Atlanta Falcons (6-7 SU, 8-5 ATS)
The most unfortunate part about a 23-26 loss to the Saints is that it was engineered by Chris Redman and Jason Snelling. Sorry, but those guys aren’t the future in the Dirty Dirty so that game told us nothing about what to expect from the Falcons.
Next Game: Atlanta vs. NYJ
26. Carolina Panthers (5-8 SU, 6-7 ATS)
Someone tell Chris Gamble that he can’t whine and moan about Randy Moss appearing to take plays off when his team loses 10-20. In a related story, both Eric Mangini and Rex Ryan were watching Gamble run his dumb mouth and both though simultaneously, “That is MY kind of guy!”
Next Game: Minnesota (-7) vs. Carolina
27. Oakland Raiders (4-9 SU, 6-7 ATS)
You know things are dire in the bay area when the crowd, the announcers and the entire Raiders’ roster is wondering, “CRAP! WHAT HAPPENED TO GRADKOWSKI?! IS HE HURT? IS HE COMING BACK IN?” Times are tough in the world today, but if my hopes lingered on a guy like Gradkowski I’d be burying myself in a case of whisky. On second thought, Raider Nation doesn’t sound so bad…
Next Game: Oakland vs. Denver (-11.5)
28. Kansas City Chiefs (4-9 SU, 6-7 ATS)
Sometimes I casually wonder what Denver would’ve looked like had Matt Cassel landed with the Broncos. Kind of weird that they went from Cutler, to potentially having Cassel…to Kyle Orton and things couldn’t have worked out better for Denver.
Next Game: Cleveland vs. KC (-2.5)
29. Cleveland Browns (2-12 SU, 7-6 ATS)
How dare you, Eric Mangini. One win over a reeling Steelers team and he has the gall to say that he feels his job is safe. The only positive thing that happened for anyone in Cleveland is Joshua Cribbs proving he’s worth millions.
Next Game: Cleveland vs. KC (-2.5)
30. Detroit Lions (2-11 SU, 3-9-1 ATS)
Why does Daunte Culpepper have a job exactly? He’s not winning games and there’s no way in hell that he’s teaching Matt Stafford anything other than how to book cruises. Seriously, this guy has a job and the unemployment rate in America is skyrocketing? I’m starting to think that Detroit is the nexus of the universe or something. It’s like a four-way intersection of tragedy, stupidity, failure and depression.
Next Game: Arizona vs. Detroit
31. Tampa Bay Buccaneers (1-12 SU, 4-9 ATS)
Josh Freeman was smiling and laughing during his second interception. Glad he’s having a great time out there. Couldn’t be happier
for him.
Next Game: Tampa Bay vs. Seattle (-7)
32. St. Louis Rams (1-12 SU, 6-7 ATS)
Keith Null had the chance to prove he might be worth a shot next year as the new starting quarterback of the Rams. Then he threw five interceptions. Jimmy Clausen, come on down!
Next Game: Houston vs. St. Louis
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