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ENTERTAINMENT | Apr 19

Travis Kelce Makes the Cut for Taylor Swift’s New Album

The Biggest Plot Twist Is Who This Album Really Is About

Travis Kelce Makes the Cut for Taylor Swift’s New Album
Taylor Swift kisses Travis Kelce | Patrick T. Fallon / AFP

Travis Better Behave If He Wants to Keep Getting Good Songs…

Of the three boyfriends mentioned by Taylor Swift on her new album, The Tortured Poets Department, Travis Kelce made the cut and has officially secured his spot as one of the men she has written about. 

I don’t know if he should feel honored or terrified.

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Historically, depending on how Taylor decides to paint her partner in one of her albums, it can make or break a man’s career (I’m not exaggerating – John Mayer is the perfect example of this phenomenon. When’s the last time we heard anything about him in entertainment news?)

Lucky for Trav, he’s been on his best behavior, and in the song “So High School,” she depicts their romance as blissfully simple and easy. She even directly references the moment so long ago when Travis played Kiss, Marry, Kill and chose to kiss Taylor Swift, long before the two had ever met. 

Lyrics from Taylor’s New Song “So High School”:

“Are you gonna marry, kiss or kill me? (Kill me)
It’s just a game, but really (Really)
I’m bettin’ on all three for us two (All three)
Get my car door, isn’t that sweet? (That sweet)
Then pull me to thе backseat (The backseat)
No onе’s ever had me (Had me), not like you”

But Travis is the only man on this album who managed to come out unscathed. 

One of the major controversies right now is that her album was expected to expose Joe Alwyn for cheating on her. However, the latest Taylor Swift songs seem to dispel those celebrity rumors and paint a different story about how she was in love with Matt Healy, singer of The 1975, while in a relationship with Alwyn and couldn’t push her feelings for him aside. 

 

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This is controversial because Matt Healy has been called out for his distasteful and downright disrespectful jokes in the past. Despite this, it appears in Taylor’s lyrics that he ended the relationship. 

For example, she seems to be accusing Healy of ghosting her on the song “loml”, as she sings:

“Was any of it true?
Gazing at me starry-eyed
In your Jehovah’s Witness suit
Who the f*ck was that guy?
You tried to buy some pills
From a friend of friends of mine
They just ghosted you/ Now you know what it feels like”

In another new song, “The smallest man who ever lived,” she sings:

“And I don’t even want you back. I just want to know
If rusting my sparkling summer was the goal
And I don’t miss what we had, but could someone give
A message to the smallest man who ever lived?”

If I were Matt Healy, I’d be in shambles after being called “the smallest man who ever lived.” Honestly, it is a bit shocking that someone like Matt Healy could capture her attention and inspire so many songs at this stage in her romantic maturity. He’s kind of a loser at this point. But I don’t know if she has ever really experienced her “I can fix him” phase until her romance with Healy. 

Either way, Travis should be on his best behavior if he wants to keep getting love-dovey songs written about him. The last thing he wants is a song titled “Viva Las Vegas,” which spills about how he’s only a champion because Patrick Mahomes is an outstanding quarterback.

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