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MORE SPORTS | Feb 02

Let’s Talk About the Olympics on Steroids

The Enhanced Games, a Drug-Friendly Version of the Olympics, Will Debut in 2025

Like the Olympics but Make it Doping-Friendly
This photograph shows the five Olympic medals, two gold and three silver, won by Quentin Fillon-Maillet during the Olympic Games Beijing 2022 in men's Biathlon, in Paris, on March 23, 2022./JOEL SAGET / AFP

This Should Be Fun to Watch 💉

Allow the scientists to get to work and create the most powerful steroids known to man…

Juice-heads unite!

TRT, trenbolone, oxymetholone, stanozolol, etc; it’s your time to shine, baby.

Gone are the days of those party-pooping, drug-testing moments in athletics because it would seem an extremely wealthy collection of online investors is looking to evolve the Olympics into a drug-positive realm where you can sip all the juice you please and still compete.

Ready for unfiltered sports madness? Telegram is the place. Join us!

What’s been labeled The Enhanced Games, which is technically hoping to form a 21st-century variation of the Olympics minus the drug testing, the likes of Peter Thiel (PayPal co-founder), Balaji Srinivasan (former Coinbase CTO), and venture capitalist Christian Angermayer are amongst the investors.


Expected to debut in 2025, the first Enhanced Games has listed the following events thus far:

  • Combat Sports
  • Weight lifting
  • Gymnastics
  • Swimming
  • Track and Field

Combat sports, you say? Count me in!

Somebody call TRT Vitor Belfort right now and let the glory days of MMA return in fashion with his famed, blood-doping antics.

Allow the scientists to get to work and create the most powerful steroids known to man, and let’s see Thanos versus The Hulk or Juggernaut; take my money already.

 

Legal Cheating

Ok, so I can see the complaints already; “encouraged cheating,” “harmful substances,” and “death by test.” But listen, if you think for one moment that 100% of athletes are clean, you’re as stupid as the organizations that believe they’re going to catch every athlete juicing up.


I understand nobody likes to cheat, but it’s a level playing field if everyone is allowed. Furthermore, at least Thiel and Co are honest with their approach, and nobody is forcing anyone to compete if you aren’t down with the needle.

However, for those who love a nice anabolic for breakfast, gear up (pun intended) because sh*t’s about to get wild.

Aron D’Souza, President of the Enhanced Games, mentioned that the games will break world records. Sure, they won’t count, but watching it will be fun!

Most importantly, the Enhanced Games won’t piss away our tax dollars, unlike that other “drug-free” athletics event, cough *2024 Olympics* cough.

Get the needles out, embrace the doping, and let’s have ourselves a good time.

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