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NBA | Oct 26

Fashion Police: NBA’s Hottest Looking (Or Not) Fits Are Back Baby!

The Most Stylish Men In the Most Stylish League

Fashion Police: NBA's Hottest Looking (Or Not) Fits Are Back Baby!
Miami Heat Twitter account.

Some of These Were HOT 🔥🔥

Michael Porter Jr. may have been on the winning side, but he certainly wasn’t rocking a winning fit…

Once the 2022/23 NBA season had concluded, I knew my time as Chief Constable of the Fashion Police would quieten down. Let’s face it: sports fashion is a shell of itself when the National Basketball Association isn’t participating.

But that’s behind us because NBA rumors and NBA news are rife once again. It’s October, and you know what that means: basketball season is in full swing, and my handcuffs are shined and primed, ready to jail anyone who believes they can strut around the tunnel in atrocious outfits.

Hit or Miss? MISS!

Sure, fashion style has long thrived in the NBA compared to other sports leagues, but I’m making an instant arrest this week.

Victor Wembanyama, we’re taking you to the station for further questioning. Baggy clothes of this nature, draped on a 7 feet 4-inch frame are not acceptable.


Following a deeper investigation, Wembanyama was the tip of the iceberg; who allowed these two muppets out of their houses dressed like this?


If we didn’t know them as professionals on the court, would we let our children near them?

Life sentences and no parole in maximum security…an absolute disgrace. And sure, I understand the urge for creative flair and self-expression in the tunnel at NBA games, but sometimes–most of the time–the hit-and-miss approach is a complete miss!

I’m not here to completely sh*t on everyone and make multiple arrests. The Denver Nuggets got the memo, most of them anyway.

 

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Fit of the Week Award

CP3, stand up, my man; what an excellent fit you’re working with here.

 

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The multi-colored knitted cardigan could’ve gone two ways, and you chose the worthy path, my friend. Fitted jeans and white trainers, instead of some ridiculous, oversized trousers accompanied with blocky footwear that nobody enjoys seeing.

The shades complement this fit nicely, too, and although they’re probably good at blocking the haters, sadly, they couldn’t block the rays of the Phoenix Suns.

Tip-Off or Fashion Show?

The Lakers vs Nuggets and Warriors vs Spurs kicked off the 2023/24 NBA season this week. And the G.O.A.T, LeBron James, wasn’t ashamed to rock a $28k Louis Vuitton set.


If James and his squad were more focused on the Lakers game instead of their fashion show, the 12-point deficit and season-opening defeat to the Nuggets might have turned out differently… Nah, probably not.


Elsewhere, Michael Porter Jr. may have been on the winning side, but he certainly wasn’t rocking a winning fit…


First of all, how dare you remove a signed Peyton Manning jersey from its frame? Keep that sh*t on the wall. Secondly, find a pair of pants that fit you. Honestly, it isn’t 2001; somebody? Anybody! please make regular and fitted pants great again.

 

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I’ll finish today’s shift on Fashion Police duty with the above image, as I truly have no words for men who refuse to wear shirts.

May the fit be with you, peace!

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